A period at the end of a sentence

I am almost 67 years old. I reached my magic number with social security this month. I am about to be a grandma (Mimsy). I have an empty nest (And I am actually still without a nest). I am past midlife and more of my life is behind me than in front of me. These are facts that I cannot avoid and have decided to no longer ignore. Many people, including 2 of my 3 siblings, have already put an end to their work life. On Monday – July 6 – I will also put a period on the end of that sentence. I will turn the page and start a new chapter on Tuesday. I will retire and permanently exit the workforce, although I am slowly phasing out as I finish a few tasks. How weird is that?! Retirement is for old people! 

I do not think that a believer ever retires from serving God. In fact, my parents modeled the opposite. When they retired early from their careers as a rocket scientist (dad) and nursing educator (mom), they pursued more education and international ministry as well as mentoring. They chose to pursue kingdom activities rather than spending decades primarily on hobbies without an eternal focus. Pretty cool role models.

 

I will say that all of this is quite unsettling and odd for me and I am not ready. I never really imagined this day. But, then again, I did not know that I would be facing these days and years without Jim, without a home, and wondering what to do when I grow up. I have loved ministry. Even though it has been a long and slow withdrawal over the past years, the door was never shut. Now it feels different! I think it feels scary to retire because it represents an unprecedented lifestyle change. I am continuing to lose more identity – professionally this time – along with those social connections and spheres of influence. It feels scary because the shift is from earning to spending and I hope that I won’t outlive my resources or become a burden on my kids. And it feels scary because it is the uncertainty of the unknown – alone.

 

So, now what?! How can I reimagine my life after work? How can I maintain the disciplines and habits that the rhythm of work provides? How can I steward my time and resources responsibly? How do I rest without becoming slothful or selfish? How do I keep having a positive influence in the world or at least my corner of it? May I keep being curious and intentional. May I keep finding new and creative ways to make much of Jesus. May He get all the credit in this new chapter – Act 3. To be continued… 

First thing to do before my first full day of retirement?! – turn off the alarm clock!!!!