30 is the Next decade!
XXX is a turkey in bowling. It is the number of days in most months. It is the age that Jesus started his public ministry. Abraham Lincoln said that a man should not make any serious decisions until he is 30. Well, Connor, it is too late for that philosophy, since you have already chosen a relationship with the Lord and found your life partner.
I remember my 30th well. It was 2 surprise parties in 2 states followed by a good year. It seems like others began to see me as an adult (finally) and there was enough distance from childhood to feel like I was really independent and capable. Most twenty somethings think they know what is going on; but by the time you get to your thirties you realize that no one really knows what they are doing because they have never been that age before. So life becomes just about accepting things. The best question I learned to ask myself is, “Is this really going to matter in five years?” (This is also the “don’t sweat the small stuff and it is mostly all small stuff” mentality). It wasn’t until I was in my thirties that I got healthy enough to process the idea of family, both creating one of our own, and considering the relationships of our families of origin to get over the hurts and issues and find a way to make it work on even footing.
Unless you are already dead — mentally, emotionally, and socially — you cannot anticipate your life 5 years into the future. It will not develop as you expect. In our 20s we have a lot of dreams. We believe that we have all of the time in the world to make those visions a reality. By now many of the ideas and things you dreamt about defining your life either are true or they never will be. But the good news is that many things you never expected and still cannot anticipate are in your best days yet to come. You have developed competencies that perhaps you didn’t even intend to, but they are part of who God designed you to be.
The world does not teach you how to be a man. It just demands conformity and taxes. I pray that your values always be in conflict with those of the world, and that your toughest decisions be behind you. Everything in life is a trade-off. We give up one thing to get another and we can’t have it all. This realization comes in one’s 30’s much the way that a kid of 12 or 13 realizes that Christmas was better when they were younger! The best thing to do is live gratefully for what we do have and give thanks daily and wholeheartedly to the King for choosing us and blessing us.
I certainly love you Connor and I am proud of you. May this year be your best yet for the glory of the Lord. And may all your birthday wishes come true. With Hope, Miriam