What is with all the irritated people?

Why are people so easily irritated? Why do they complain all the time? I am so irritated by this and I want to complain about it for a minute!

I wish I wasn’t kidding! I especially do not understand  the number of godly people who are impatient, short tempered, and crabby – and who try to justify it!! The other day I heard someone complain about others making noise in the lobby at their workplace. I heard someone else whine because someone seemed inconsiderate at a ball game. I could go on and on with the nonsense I have heard in just the last week. Why do we base our perspective on our intentions but on everyone else’s behavior? Why do we think our own rights supercede those of  others? Why do we think it is okay to focus on the negative and to live our lives in deficit? I do not mean to judge those who are judgmental,  or complain about the complainers, or express irritation at the irritated. BUT I have had enough! I know that I am going to push a lot of buttons with this post and I am going to get push back, but I do not understand why people are so easily annoyed, whose buttons are so easily pushed.

I honestly believe that complaining is what caused a 40 year detour in the desert for God’s people.  Numbers 11 says that complaining displeases the Lord. James 5:9 says not to complain in the imperative. Phil. 2:14 says to do everything without grumbling and arguing. While I do not think that being irritated is a sin because it is a natural human emotion that even Jesus expressed in the temple court. I do, however,  believe it can lead to sin which is why the Bible encourages managing this emotion, specifically warning against letting anger or frustration fester.  The bottom line is that God does not like it; complaining dishonors him and being irritable is not loving or kind. 1 Cor. 13 says that love is not irritable or easily provoked. Further, being slow to anger, living at peace with everyone, and putting others’ needs first can’t happen when irritability and complaining are in control. I do not think this is possible with an irritable heart attitude to be people who overlook offenses and don’t keep score, who reconcile and forgive.

I honestly do not have an answer and I do it too, but why? Why do we complain? Why are we so easily irritated? Perhaps we have raised entitlement to a new level. Maybe we see things so selfishly and myopically. And then, there is the cultural norm to cast blame and play the victim card too well. And I think we unconsciously hold others to perfectionistic expectations.  When we live this way, we see ourselves as better than others and we tend to focus on flaws of others. When we live life thinking we deserve something, we create superiority complexes, and comparison games. When we our expectations don’t align with reality we grumble about life’s unfairness.

I am learning to be content with grey. I am trying to be satisfied even when I am disappointed and discouraged. I am trying to accept hard things, loss and pain and be okay with it. I am trying to let expectations go. It is hard. I don’t like it. But I also don’t need to focus on it or talk about it. Complaining and being irritated does NOT change the situation. It can actually make it worse.  It is my belief that the more I count my blessings and focus on the good things, even when life is not what I want, the less likely I will see things I do not like. When I think toxic thoughts repeatedly I only reinforce the very thing I do not want to do. Grumble. Whine. Be irritable.  Just like the Israelites, I shrink my hope and joy when I forget God’s goodness.

Everyday is a chance to rewire my brain and to realign my heart. It is an opportunity to notice the good, to be thankful, and to notice the many underserved kindnesses of a generous God. It takes ongoing practice to be positive and speak life giving words, especially when all around me there are so many who do not.