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Archive for the ‘grief’ Category

My mom and I had dinner recently and as we were talking she mentioned that the question “Why” is almost always the wrong question. It got me thinking and wanting to ask the question, “Why is that?!” (hahaha) Why do humans always want to know why? We seem to have a need to justify things […]

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The other day I was approached by a Facebook team and asked if I would be willing to give an interview about my experience with a Memorial page on the social media site, because of the way I memorialized Jim’s Facebook page.  I was happy to oblige as I was hoping they would allow me […]

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Sometimes I still find myself in the selfish and sad place; this dark and disastrous hole of despair and grief that causes me to feel isolated, cynical and negative about everything.  I guess it is time to decide to get out of the hole and climb out to reclaim the day, dramatically shifting my attitude […]

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Empty

I am like a desert owl, like an owl among the ruins. I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof.  Psalm 102:6,7  (my lament as my nest gets emptier) Jim used to ask kids to point their finger at their temple and say the letters T M over and over quickly.  Of […]

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I’m gonna celebrate this heartbeat Cause it just might be my last Everyday is a gift from the Lord on high And they all go by so fast…. (lyrics and song by Randy Stonehill) This is the tune stuck in my head this morning as I ponder the brevity of life and the struggle for […]

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6 years since the strange shuffling of his foot and the droop in in his smile.  6 years since he seemed to become slow to respond and abnormally quiet.  6 years since the “C” word entered my life and altered the landscape of my existence.  6 years.  It seems distant and faded in many ways.  I […]

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It is hard to admit because it feels shameful to be sad, but the fact of the matter is that this season is not easy for me. I guess I feel guilty and embarrassed that I can only outwardly appear to be composed and at peace when inwardly I feel that my grief is so […]

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Mirm in Wonderland

There are so many childhood fairy tales that have hidden meanings if we look for them.  Sometimes they are there intentionally as in Narnia and sometimes perhaps there are just lessons that can be applied to our own story like a parable.  I love both kinds of tales and the secret lands that I find […]

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The Empty Nest Syndrome

I totally “get” the empty nest syndrome – at least what it is and that I am moving into that season of life where my children are grown and relatively independent. But, I was not prepared for some of the feelings and issues that come with it! I really see things differently now that my daughter […]

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Miriam on 34th St

  It is my 34th Anniversary so I decided to have a little picnic in honor of the day.  Jim proposed at 34th street in Newport Beach on Christmas day in 1979. I was trying to think of some clever way to remember and honor the day.  There were several interesting ideas*… but in the […]

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